Mr. Johnson, or as the neighborhood kids call him, guy with the big stomach, is basically a normal guy. He has a wife, 2 kids, and a dog. He works at Gary¹s Fish and Stuff on 4th and Oak. Mr. Johnson has only one problem though… he¹s a bit on the heavy side. All right he¹s a lot on the heavy side. He weighs 702 pounds in fact. He just can¹t seem to lose the weight.
He¹s tried diets, exercise, hypnotists, and even lypo-suction. As he was reading the paper one morning, he noticed an ad that read, “Marvin the magnificent Magician can do anything you want for the low low price of $29.95. Mr. Johnson new he had to call this man. He copied the phone number and called up the magician. He made an appointment for Monday and he couldn¹t wait.
Monday came so he went as fast as he could. When he got there Marvin was waiting. Mr. Johnson went inside but on his way in he tripped on the door stop shaped like a duck. He stumbled and then fell to the ground. The bad thing was Marvin was under the fat man. Mr. Johnson managed to get himself up and noticed he had crushed the poor magician. “I¹ve killed him, I killed my only hope of ever being thin,” cried the incredibly obese man. Just then a limo pulled up and Maurice Vanderham, the most famous movie producer got out. “I found him, I found the man I¹ve been looking for to star in my new film, Fat Guys Who Go To the Beach and Wear Skimpy bathing suits and Drink A Lot of Beer,” exclaimed the producer.
“Me, you want me,” asked the large guy!
“Yes you fatty”
Mr. Johnson became a famous movie star and he was loved by all the people in the world. He soon divorced his wife and moved to Hollywood. The old neighborhood kids now call him, that rich fat bastard. He forgot all about his old life and his old job at the fish market. Even though he¹s a fat, rude, a murderer and fat… I still like Mr. Johnson.